Bandit: What you an' Fred want? Little Enos: Because he's thirsty, dummy! Sheriff Branford: Where in the woods? B, Tanker Truck Driver: The welcome mat is out, and you're comin' home. Me an' Fred's got a question. On the other hand, if we stayed on the odd channels, switched every time and started in the basement, that'd work, too. I suggest that you let my department handle the situation. Little Enos: You know, I think you're just a little bit scared.
Cledus Snow: How 'bout forgettin' it? This whole movie is a lifeless, by-the-numbers effort, and completely devoid of any true redeeming qualities. By the time I was four, we were living in San Antonio, Texas, and I just remember picking a blue bonnet and getting yelled at by some guy with a sheriff hat and a badge. You must be part coon dog. So you boys just stay here and keep your hands on the car until one of my associates arrive. One shit at a time! Snowman: Yeah, how about the money? Cledus Snow: What's she wearing now? He musta snuck up on my back door when I wasn't lookin! The fact that you are a sheriff is not germane to the situation. It's bad for your health.
Can you drive this thing? That be the Evel Knievel. Bandit: And you have a unique way with the English language, Miss Frog. Justice: I'm gonna barbeque yo' ass in molasses! Gleason should have known better, but still, any moment he's on screen is a welcome relief in this turkey. Marvin Acme 1- Atlanta to Texarkana and back in twenty eight hours? The movie is filled with stupid and pointless scenes. Bandit: Goddamn it, son, we gave it our best shot.
That's called bootleggin' and that's against the law. Listen I don't care if your dad is the mayor, you wreck this car; it's commin out of your pay. God, I really thought that was it. Why do you want that beer so bad? A big chance - to make a run, for some big bucks. Bandit: Hey, I'll load it on with this! Like with most bad movies, the whole central thesis of this film is wrong. They should give you intravenous feedings of People magazine and National Enquirer headlines!. I happen to have my young son in the car, and I don't want to hear that kind of language.
Aint got no time for that crap!!! Bandit: Well thats the reason, son! Can ya hear me boy? Justice: You got trouble comin. Oh yeah, what can you say about a race movie so bad that even Hal Needham won't direct it? Sam Spade: Now wait a minute! Bob is one of the greatest songwriters ever. Lord knows I've caught my share. You must be part coon dog, 'cause I've been chased by the best of them, and son, you make 'em look like they're all runnin' in slow motion. You better flip-flop back here and gimme' a hand, son, or we gonna be in a heap of trouble. Throws notepad aside Hell, I got to go. Especially when you've got those things in your hair.
Sheriff Justice: That's very comfortin'. Justice: Breaker, breaker for the Bandit. Set up a road block. The scene isn't funny, but it shows that there is some sort of epic relationship between Smokey and the Bandit. Maybe someone should have told him that being proxy to a legend isn't a compliment.
Reed was added for new footage to fill the gaps, which explains why he doesn't even show up until half an hour into the movie. Especially when you've got those things in your hair. His replacement, Dick Lowry, seems to have no particular talent of his own, and justly returned to directing television shortly after. Junior: Daddy, my hat blew off! Bandit's ass around the moon by now! Negatory, negatory, what're you, crazy or something?! Bandit: Come on back, breaker. Big Ben: I don't like that idea. Hey, Bandit, Hey, Bandit, listen to this! When we get home, the first thing I'm gonna do. When we get home remind me to slap your momma in the mouth.
Makes me think you're listening to a radio station in Savannah. So move over a bit, good buddy, 'cause the Snowman is coming through! I doubt the first version could have been worse than the finished product. Cledus Snow: Atlanta to Texarkana and back in twenty eight hours? Bank robbery is baby shit compared to what this dudes doin! One of them casts his line off and ends up catching his line on the fish Buford's got on his roof. And as the pursuer, may I say you're the goddamnedest pursuee I've ever pursued. Did you see that sheriff he went right through i'll road block. How would you like to be the man that handcuffs a ledgend!. The first thing I'm gonna do when I get home is punch your mama in the mouth! Hey Boy, where's sheriff Brandford?? That ain't never been done before, not in no rig.
Cledus Snow: What's she wearing now? Sheriff Justice: You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella! We we get home remind me to slap your momma in the mouth. You're too good a man. Sheriff Branford: I hear perfectly. Bandit: Well what's your handle son, and what's your twenty? Cledus Snow: How come we doin' this? B, Tanker Truck Driver: Bandit? Who's gonna hold your hat? Carrie: What about the money? I saw that you sum-bitch!! If you would like to additional quotes, please visit the page. But he also has a distinctive feeling for relationships, and he's good with a joke. Cledus Snow: How 'bout forgettin' it? Big Ben: Hey, now wait a minute! Junior: Except for that- Sheriff Justice: Shut yo' ass.